A True Story

Mary had a little lamb,
Little lamb, little lamb,
Mary had a little lamb,
Its fleece was white as snow

When I was a freshman in high school I developed a habit of missing the bus to school, which would force my mom into giving me a ride, making her late for work. She finally got fed up and told me that if I missed the bus again she wasn't going to take me and I would just have to go to detention for missing school. I really didn't want to inconvenience my mom OR go to detention so I put forth an extra effort to not miss the bus, but try as I may to avoid it, I missed it again the day of fall finals. Of all days to screw up, it had to be finals.

Everywhere that Mary went,
Mary went, Mary went,
Everywhere that Mary went
The lamb was sure to go

There was no way in heck I was going to ask my mom for a ride after how mad she had gotten the last time. Since I was one of the first people on the bus route, there was still over an hour before school started, and although I had never attempted it before, I figured I could walk the couple miles to school and my mom would never find out that I missed the bus. My plan was perfect, or so I thought, so I slipped out the back door quietly and started the long walk down the train tracks through the fields. I quickly realized that our faithful family dog, Cookie, was following me. She followed us on all our other outdoor adventures, why not this one? I knew that if I took her back home and closed her in the house she would start whining and barking to get out and my mom would see me walking to school, so I kept walking and urged, pleaded, and prayed that she would quit following me and go back home. Well, she didn't.

It followed her to school one day
School one day, school one day
It followed her to school one day
Which was against the rules.

I thought for sure they were going to call my mom and send me home. Instead, she accompanied me to each of my finals; one in biology and one in world geography. Biology went smoothly and Cookie was well behaved, but by the time world geography came she was getting restless and started whining at the classroom door in the middle of the test. The teacher made me sit outside with Cookie while I finished my test and she decided to take off running around the building. I used my multitasking skills to chase after her while finishing my test, then at long last the day was over.

It made the children laugh and play,
Laugh and play, laugh and play,
It made the children laugh and play
To see a lamb at school

Much to my dismay, the bus driver wouldn't let Cookie on the bus which meant I had to walk all the way back home. I passed by the front parking lot where I saw a family friend, Debbie Thatcher, who naturally inquired as to why Cookie was with me at school. I gave her a brief explanation, then I started my walk home.

And so the teacher turned it out,
Turned it out, turned it out,
And so the teacher turned it out,
But still it lingered near

When I finally got home, I was exhausted. The school was much farther on foot than it seemed and I had gone to school with no lunch money, but I did it- finished my finals and fooled my mom. I was quite content... until my mom called and, while attempting not to laugh, told me she knew what I had done! How did she know?! I went through all that trouble and thought I was so sly, but she found out anyway! Thankfully my mom has a good sense of humor and waived my punishments, knowing that a walk to Central West and back was punishment enough, but she wouldn't reveal her informant. After hours of contemplation, I realized that Debbie ratted me out. I guess it was just too funny to keep to herself.

And waited patiently about,
Patiently about, patiently about,
And waited patiently about
Till Mary did appear

After that experience, "Mary Had a Little Lamb" has a whole new meaning for me. I can sympathize with Mary in ways I never anticipated and I certainly wouldn't be surprised if it was based on a true story. Cookie passed away a few years ago, but I will never forget her day at school.

"Why does the lamb love Mary so?"
Love Mary so? Love Mary so?
"Why does the lamb love Mary so?"
The eager children cry

"Why, Mary loves the lamb, you know."
Loves the lamb, you know, loves the lamb, you know
"Why, Mary loves the lamb, you know."
The teacher did reply