There are things about motherhood that you will never understand until you experience them yourself- from how much you will love and cherish your baby down to how much you will worry about them. You cherish the moments you can just enjoy the love like an escape from the worry. Then just about the time you think the worry is gone, it comes right back again in some other form. The love and worry never go away, they just grow and change just like your baby.
A month ago, Keira took a dive off of the couch and landed right on her head. She went from crying to absolutely limp and fighting for consciousness. It felt like it took forever to wake her up although it was only a few seconds. It was a weekend so I called the on-call pediatrician and explained what happened and they said they suspected that she just cried so hard it made her pass out. I wasn't content with this explanation, but I didn't see any residual effects from her fainting episode and tried not to get too worked up about it.
Since then, she has fainted two more times. Each time has been from a bump on the head, but not a hard enough bump to where she should be fainting. It is so unnerving to see her absolutely lifeless, and after having to experience that three times I decided it was time to get some real answers. We took her to see Dr. Jones today and he recommended a few tests at the hospital. The first of which was an ultrasound of her brain, then we will be going in soon to have an EKG and EEG test done.
If it is nothing to worry about, then I just want to know I have nothing to worry about and if it is something to be concerned about I need to know that too. Until then, I will just pray and try to push that worry away and take every opportunity I have to hold my little girl in my arms and bask in my love for her and think about the first words I said when she was born- the same words I will think every time I see her for the rest of my life, "She is SO BEAUTIFUL."
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